name : wesTheme by nostrich.
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It hasn’t been an industry secret that Coolio, of “Gangsta’s Paradise” fame and internet video chef, was coming out with a cookbook. I’ve actually enjoyed his bat-shit crazy demeanor while cooking up some delicious dishes like “Swashbucklin’ Shrimp” and “Cool-a-Cado”.
But damn it, Coolio: you’ve crossed the line.
Since my early beginnings as an amateur wanna-be chef, I’ve dabbled in a myriad of off-the-beaten-path items, referred to affectionately by friends, family, and myself alike as “GHETTO GOURMET”!
ME! I COINED AND CREATED THAT TERM!”
Go ahead, reader of mine. Go to your local bookstore, and thumb through a few pages of his book. Does “Banana Ba-ba-ba-bread” sound like something homies in the hood chow down on?! Or how about “Tricked Out Westside Tilapia”? You know the only fish that people in the ghetto know about? I do. It’s called “FISH”.
I bet you’re not going to find true gems that I’ve painstakingly prepared and perfected over the years. What, no spaghetti and hot dogs?! Egads, not a ham, turkey, and american cheese on white with ketchup?! Blasphemy.
Coolio is as ghetto gourmet as Vanilla Ice serving breakfast at a Waffle House.
Coolio is as kitchen pimp as Kriss Kross working a drive-thru window at Burger King.
Hell, THIS guy is more ghetto pimp than Coolio EVER will be:
This injustice will not STAND!
On a side note, I really can’t wait to try out Fork Steak & Heavenly Ghettalian Garlic Bread!
[via Village Voice]